Saturday, April 2, 2011

Compliments Of The Day - A Spam Convert (courtesy of M.Rutt)

BEQUEST FOR CONVURGENT ASSININETY.
 
Greetings From Ouagadougou, (where?) This message might meet (nice to meet you too)  you in (utmost surprise),(WHAT!) however,it's just my urgent need for foreign partner (i am local) that made me to contact you for this transaction (there has been no transaction only an interaction).I am a banker (funny, I am baker)  by profession from Burkina Faso (don't they make rubbers) and currently holding (that's a foul!) the post (?) of Director Auditing and Accounting Department of the bank. at the bang.

I have the opportunity of transfering the left over funds($10million) - ten million what? rubbers?? of our bank deceased customer late Richard Burson, who died (Oh, Charles Bronson) (really? people are always doing that. stupid people)  on (Egypt Air Flight 990) along with his family (is that a coincidence) on a plane crash below.

Hence i am inviting you for a business deal (that does sound inviting) where this money can be shared (did you say smeared - I read smeared form some reason) between us in the ratio of 50/50 (if you are going to smear money between two people that is best way) .If you agree (I am angry!)  to my business proposal, further details of the transfer will be forwarded to you as soon as i receive your return (i haven't arrived yet???)  mail along with the following information's: (what? what?)

1.NAME IN FULL:............................Jamie Fool
2.ADDRESS:................................. Hello, I am a dalikrab!
3.NATIONALITY:.............................  Ouagadougouesse(?)
4.AGE:..................................... young men don't tell such things
5.SEX......................................  I don't even know you
6.OCCUPATION:.............................. no, I'm occupied
7.MARITAL STATUS:.......................... Black Belt
8.PRIVATE PHONE NO......................... Your naughty person 555-Sexy
9.PRIVATE FAX NO:..........................  very naughty  555-Slut

Respectfully yours (i don't want you!)
Mrs.Jenet Huka (huka huka huka)

Note from the author: this is for you, for your holiday. its genius! if you don't think so then you clearly don't understand it.  Probably I don't understand either. maybe its shit. yeah that sounds about right....it's shit. take my shit please. - M.Rutt

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